Happy Thanksgiving, everybody! It’s Steve’s favorite holiday, and we’ve eaten turkey for the last 3 dinners. First, it was the 20-pounder I cooked for us and his mom, aunt, sister and brother-in-law. That occasion included a lot of cleaning up and rearranging books so that the book business didn’t take over the dining & living room. The result of that work is being able to provide a comfortable place for people to gather, relax, feast, listen to music, and converse. Holding a safe space open for life to unfold is a responsibility that I willingly accept, and I am thankful that I have figured out how to do that with the resources available to me. I am very thankful for my partner and for the home that we have made together. The day after Thanksgiving, we went down to visit my children in Illinois. With all 4 of them, plus my daughter’s boyfriend and her godfather, we made 8. She cooked another turkey and we brought our leftovers to share for this second feast. I am thankful for my children, for the unique and wonderful people they are and for the fact that I have a healthy, happy relationship with each of them. Yesterday, we drove home, past Glacial Park where we had our first date, back to our clean and tidy little duplex apartment. Steve went back to work, I took a nap, and later fixed some more leftover turkey for supper. Oh, but just before that, something else happened. I had a good cry. You see, my oldest daughter went shopping on Black Friday and bought…a wedding dress. All by myself, back at home, I put on a Louis Armstrong CD, “What A Wonderful World”. I felt happy and lonely, missing her father who died in 2008. I wrote a sentimental bit of poetry, drank some vodka & cranberry juice, and let it flow. Life moves and changes and goes on. We are the bearers of our own memories, the crucible of our own journeys, and no one else shares that responsibility with us. That can feel very lonely sometimes, but it also feels satisfying. I am filled with the weight of my life and still have room for more. For that, I am especially thankful.
Conversation
scillagrace 
Your photos really are a window into your world. Sounds like a warm and wonderful Thanksgiving. Congrats to you and your daughter!
Thank you, Elena, for “con-gratu-lations”…for being grateful with us!
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What an eloquent post–you are so good with words. I think you struck a nerve, because it made me teary. I am so happy that you have your precious family–they will always be a sweet connection to your husband, even if it brings sadness too. Congratulations on the launch of your daughter. Life goes on, sometimes way faster than I ever anticipate. Resisting does no good, so I take comfort in the fact that my kids are healthy and pretty well launched, but still love to come home. And grandchildren will be, so I understand, one of the sweetest chapters of all!
“Resisting does no good”… I was just reading about that in a passage about the 4 Noble Truths. To go with life’s energy is to relieve suffering.
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I’m sorry that you don’t have your husband with you to share such a special time… My mom just lost her dad and while I know it’s not the same, holidays and special occasions really create a nostalgic and sad atmosphere… but you have so much beauty in your life and I’m happy to hear of all the things you’re thankful for!
Love these pics — especially the top right b&w! Your bookshelves are inspiring 🙂
Thanks, Doree, for your compliments and your compassion. Steve is pretty happy with that picture, too. Another keeper for the author bio on the flap of a book he may one day write…
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